I am Sorry

I'm Sorry

To all of my brothers in Christ:

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for every time one of us girls
has done something that has caused you to stumble.

I'm sorry for every time we've broken one of your hearts.

I'm sorry for every time society blamed you for girls' low self-esteem.

I'm sorry for every time you haven't been able to look at us
because of our immodest clothing.

I'm sorry for all the times you had to cry in pain
because we girls were setting ourselves up as stumbling blocks.

I'm sorry for every time one of us girls
took your authority away and dominated over you.

I'm sorry for confusing you.

I'm sorry for every time we didn't give you a chance to be chivalrous.

I'm sorry we don't try to understand.

I know just one girl among billions saying she's sorry
won't make much of a difference.
But I really am sorry.
We girls don't make it easy for you guys.
Instead of being the encouraging support woman was made to be,
we are your greatest stumbling block.

For you, my Christian brothers, my heart breaks.

Like I said,
I know one apology
won't make much of a difference,
but it needed to be offered.

To any guy
who has struggled, stumbled, or fallen
with the influence of the girls,
I'm sorry.

You don't know how much I am sorry.

In sisterly love,
a Christian sister

This Wooing Love

Can you, a simple man, understand God's love? This topic of God's love seems like water that never quenches our true thirst or like answers that only leads to more questions for as much for as much as my soul longs to understand this love it appears that the answer is always alittle farther on or beyond the next mountain ridge. No matter how deep I bury myself in sin or how many times I turn from this love never leaves me. It is always there wooing me away from my wants or desires and turning me toward God and His open arms.

Do I deserve this love? Not in the least. Can I earn this love? No, for this love is and will be a free gift given to those He desires. Why has He chosen me for this love? I do not understand and never will in this life. Am I grateful for this love? Not always. God gives this gift of love to whom he desires so that this gift enables those chosen to do what He has planned for them since the beginning of time. Why I will never know.

Can you reject this love? Yes you can. While on earth on this earth there is time to receive or reject this love. But a day will come that the time to receive this love will be gone and never to return. To those who reject this love will be eternally rejected by this love and will regret this decision for all eternity. The time is gone. The time is gone. Yet, those who receive this love will be recieved by this love for all eternity. This love will never leave or forsake you or me on earth or in heaven.

These are reflections are from my heart. I hope you are encouraged by these reflections. . . . Maybe more will follow or maybe not.

A Journey with Alice in Wonderland

I watched the newish Alice in Wonderland last night. Not as creepy as I was lead to believe, alittle hard to understand what they were saying(wish I had subtitles). Interesting storyline,(where did it come from, because it was definitaltly not in the cartoon version). The guy proposing to Alice = really creepy and not at all attractive to my way of thinking. I really enjoy movies where the guy is the hero not the creepy servant bowing to the woman he "loves" or serves might be a better word.

Characters I thought Mia Wasikowska did a fab job playing the older Alice. Johnny Deep was great yet not fab and orange hair is definitly not his greatest color just saying. Ann Hathaway was almost creepy looking with her blonde hair. The girl playing Alice's older sister was really pretty and I wish I knew how to do my hair like that.

I think that I pay way too much attention to detail.

Over all I liked it, I am not in a huge hurry to see it again yet I would watch it. I think the overall story of the movie was alittle too feminist for my liking. One thing that I noticed about it was the "relationship" not sure that is the right word here however I can not think of another one so.... when Alice returns the eyeball to that big whatamaycallit and then that whatamaycallit becomes her "friend" and helps her out. Shows that a good deed is never wasted and though you may not know the result of your kind deed or what may become of it. Your kind deed might have a profound inmpact on their life and maybe even yours. So even though that part of the message might slip by some people ,yet, I am glad that it is there.

So what is the overall message of the story? That we all have a path that we are to follow and the way we follow that path affects other people

Pray, and Let God Worry!

As some of you know, I was wait-listed in attending Teenpact (if you don't know what that is email/message me) AR. Well anyway the Wednesday night before the week-long class starts I learn that I get to go. Besides the fact that I have no homework, laundry, or packing done, I also learn that our friends the Spanns are going to be spending Sunday night with us before we head to the capital on Monday, needless to say my week just got a whole lot busier. Before I learned that I got to go, I was content yet sad that I did not get to spend the week with some swang teenagers. God had been reminding me of this quote from Martin Luther about God being in control which states,"Pray, and let God worry." So while waiting for news of getting to attend Teenpact, I just put it into God's hand and said if you want me to attend TeenPact its in your hands not mine and if not then I am content with that decision.

While at TeenPact, I had a fantastic time with great memories. Though still God was working on me in different ways. One being elections; during Teenpact there are elections to elect 3 Representatives and 1 Governor during the week, no matter how hard I try I can never get elected. This is frustrating to me because I consider myself a good public speaker ,yet, my party platforms are usually complete opposite to what I believe in and I can't quickly think of a memorable response contrary to what I believe. Plus I see my friends get elected year after year and I compare myself with them and wonder why am I not good enough to be elected?

The second being; Pride how does that go with wondering why I am not good enough? Simple really, I have different areas of pride vs comparing myself with others. I am usually a very outgoing and outspoken person (as you probably know already) ,yet, I talk but I don't listen when other people are talking. Proverbs 18:13 address this, "To answer before listening - that is folly and shame." That is Folly and shame, wow, I am being a shameful fool when I don't listen to others, this is something I have had to work on during class and in general.

Thirdly while at state class, I had several people come up and directly point out something about me that was encouraging to them. Now, don't get me wrong I love compliments as much as anyone! Yet, these particular compliments really gave me a pride boost and I had to immediately remind myself that I did not cause myself to be the person that these people are noticing God did it and God alone. It was not anything that I did or could have done. Instead of me getting the credit, I had to remove myself from the way before Christ could work on me. Another thought that I had on these compliments is people notice who we are, if we are Christians who claim to follow Christ and there is no change in us. I ask you, how do people view our witness? If we are no different than the world, then we either just blend in and or cause a bad light to be shined on all other Christians. However, when we as Christ followers stand out from the crowd and say I am truly following Christ and this decision had completely changed my life and will continue to change my life. People notice.

I know this is a bit late, however, enjoy! And come to National Convention! :D

Knowing God

Can a man every truly grasp who God is? Sometimes, I feel drawn to know who God is better. Most of these times are when I am taking a solitary walk and am admiring nature. For I see reflections of God's characteristics, yet, will I ever see His face this side of heaven? Is "true enlightment" possible? Can a man, who has limited knowledge, every truly understand who God is? Can we truly understand how God thinks and works?

Shall we know the answers to the questions asked by man since the beginning of time? For I surly don't have all the answers and I do not claim to have all the answers. Sometimes, I wonder if I create more questions than answers.

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